Dating Auditions and Try Outs

I've been wanting to write about my experiences in the dating game for awhile. Being single for over two years, it has been full of them good and bad. All are great learning tools for moving forward. Head held high. 

For me, dating takes an incredible amount of courage. More so than when I approach a stage about to hoop in front of x amount of people. What is it about about that intimate conversation, the small table with the tiny candle in the corner of the restaurant....where there is so much possibility, including rejection.

Dating can be like hosting or attending auditions. Depending on how you meet your date, may have been through a friend, from a show, from a bar, or from OKcupid where their photos seemed to pass the "attractive enough" test. Either way, the first date always seems pretty neutral. That moment when I'm about to pull the door open and step inside the very location decided on. The electric butterfly feeling is flowing through the veins, palms are so sweaty the door almost slips from my grip. Big. Deep. Breath. Sometimes I even tell the hostess I'm there on a date, to help relieve the nerves or something. Cluing someone into my emotion, now I suddenly feel like I have her rooting for me. And the first date begins. Neither party knows what to expect. Good conversation? Awkward moments where you slurp your drink down? Or do you have so much to talk about the server just gives up coming back to ask you if you're ready to order. No, you have yet to even glance at the menus. 

Regardless of the numbers of dates you have been on and how successful you felt they went, this is when the "auditions" begin. On the drive home....you begin to analyze. How was your performance? How did you present yourself? Authentically? Where you funny enough? Witty enough? Did you talk about your ex too much? Why do you keep doing that?!!  Will you get that call back?
Or you are on the other side, you are doing the curtain call. You've got your list of traits and qualities desired in a partner and you were just going down the list, check, check, check.... and you'll be giving the call backs. 

In my journal recently, I've also come to another analogy in my head. I am treating dating like trying out for a sports team. Its all about your mental prep going into the experience. So I may wear my brightest jersey, my strongest protective gear and I may be the fastest, smartest, prettiest player on the field. Regardless of all that, its the mental strength of surviving the process of being selected by another. Knowing you may or may not make the team. The essence is in nonattachment of either outcome. The morning of try outs, as you begin your journey to the playing field, the self talk begins. "If I make it, that'll be so great! If I don't make it, I suppose there is something better for me to spend my time doing." That same attitude is the one I carry into the dating game now. I'll show up, with an open heart, positive attitude and my best foot forward, because you know what? In the end. I chose me! In the end, I am the chosen one, I am the star player of my team.  

Following my heart & Returning "Home"

"First, you need to decide what you are going to do. This may sound like a simple step, or like you’ve already done it, but let me tell you, it’s the hardest, and most important step in being tough. Once you make the commitment to do something, then almost nothing can stop you. [...] So take comfort in knowing that no matter what decision you make, or what direction you want to pursue, it’s going to be amazing because it’s your path, your decision, your direction. There’s beauty in the successes and the failures of your journey. Soak up every ounce of it and know that you’re becoming a better human being."

-Casey Burgener

Here I am finding myself at the end of a lease........and even with an awesome roommate possibility, steady work, new jobs and other opportunities manifesting; my heart doesn't feel at home here. I wake up sad. 
After a lot of thought I can't bring myself to sign another lease. It makes me feel anxious. I know it is not the right thing to do. I must follow my heart. Move back to Portland, OR. 

I've flip-flopped with the notion for months. Friends, family have said "No, no, you've finally got a stable job, friends, opportunities, things are finally working out for you." and I would agree. I do see the things pointed out. But they just don't feel right. You may see all this on the outside but how many mornings will I have to convince myself that I am happy? Focus on gratitude, to fight the tears streaming down my face because I don't want to be here? For what?! For WHO? It's not for me that is for certain.

I do not want to stay here in Denver because of fear. What about money? What about work? People ask me? What will you do? I have no worries. I have no fears when I picture myself in Portland. What about the stress of being sad and depressed? of staying in a place I do not want too? 

"The best opportunities are frequently the ones with the most question marks." Reid Hoffman

Beautiful things are manifesting as I have made this decision! There is a hoop workshop in Missoula, MT which will help me stir up some MUCH NEEDED funds. I am very grateful for the opportunity. Sunday June 30th 2pm

https://www.facebook.com/events/376737745772466/?fref=ts


I also have donations for gas money set up to my paypal account groovinmegzz@gmail.com. Any donation I will offer a trade of services for! Such as nutrition counseling  personal training workout advice, program design, private zumba lessons. All available via skype/google hang out!





"You must be willing to open your heart over and over despite life's hard knocks and unpredictable obstacles. There's no getting out of the darkness until you let in some light."

"Never leave a place to run away from something, only leave to move towards something."

Flow & Restriction

The Difference between Flow and Restriction

The need to feel secure is only a bad habit. You can feel secure without even knowing what will happen to you next. It’s only a custom of the ego that requires you to “need to know” . When you can come to a “Don’t know, Don’t care” attitude-you are free!! You transcend the ego's need to know and it's reluctance to move. Just gotta move without knowing. 

If you are to become a spiritual warrior and to honor The Divine Force within, you will agree to accept all circumstances as you find them-remembering, of course, that almost everything can be improved and that things can change. What you can't change, you probably don't need to. You can just go beyond worrying about it instead. Say to yourself: "All these things are part of my human evolution. I can transcend them and go beyond." It is a simple and courageous act of acceptance. 

Instantly, you go past one of the greatest human weaknesses-the need to know. If you’re balanced today, you’ll be more balanced tomorrow because your energy is rising constantly. If you are abundant today, you’ll be more abundant tomorrow because that’s how rising energy works. 

Infinite Self-Stuart Wilde

I'm so moved while this book! It brings much clarity and reminding me of wisdom I feel I once knew. I highly recommend it! :) 

 

Aligin with Divine-Being True to Life

Teaching Hoop Dance has been an amazing privilege and honor to be able to facilitate an environment where others can explore, move, dance and be free! I've often said:
 "When I'm teaching I'm not sure how I know what to say, how I communicate so efficiently. It feels as if it's coming from above and through me. Like I'm channeling the Divine through my work"

Sounds cheesy, I know. 

But post hoop class, I feel like I'm floating, every cell in my body is buzzing! I feel electric! It's an insane sensation! And no I haven't smoked anything! ;) 

I'm reading A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle, and a passage I read last night HIT ME! This is it!! 

"So be true to life by being true to your inner purpose. As you become present and thereby total in what you do, your actions become charged with spiritual power. At first there may be no noticeable change in what you do-only the how changes. Your primary purpose is now to enable consciousness to flow into what you do. The secondary purpose is whatever you want to achieve through the doing."

Our true inner purpose is to negate time, Time is always NOW. Your state of consciousness is primary, all else is secondary. Through the present moment, you have access to the Power of Life itself! 

When I'm teaching Hoop Dance I am fully present. And therefore I am aligned with the Divine. I channel the essence of Source through my language and movement, with the intention to continue the channel into others.  

Do others feel the same?!

A Summary & Outline of 2012 HoopCamp Discussion Circle

Presented by:
Shellie White Light of The Healthy Hooper
www.thehealthyhooper.com
&
Megan Abernathy of The Hooping Body
www.thehoopingbody.com

What does it mean to be a ‘Healthy Hooper’? What does it take to create your perfect ‘Hooping Body’? There are so many different aspects to our specific type of fitness. Hoop Dance is much more than just looking beautiful while spinning the sacred circle with Grace and Ease. This grace and ease comes in time with a healthy diet, an athletic approach to training, incorporation of yoga and breath, and a holistic approach to dance as a service to yourself, others and ultimately Great Spirit. The following is a review of information that Shellie and Megz find to be the most important parts of their practice inside and outside of the circle. Blessings and Love!

The following is the perspective of The Healthy Hooper/ Shellie White Light. Check out her website! (www.thehealthyhooper)

The Healthy Hooper’s Top Ten Guidelines for Healthy Living & Hooping

1. Eat Hawaiian Spirulina!
a. MOST Bio-available Protein Source + Essential Amino Acids
b. Tastes Great in Smoothies! (Shaker is essential)
c. Increases energy, immune support, and vitality! Great for skin.

Eat Green Foods that are Still ALIVE, Organic & NON-GMO

    Make Creative Salads for Alkalinity (Shredding)

1. 1. Veggies are yummy in Smoothies J
   2. Stir-Fry Dishes in Stainless Steel (what you cook on & with matters!)

1. Hydrate with Clean & Blessed Water
   1. Always have your water bottle with you and FULL! (How many oz do you need per weight?)
   2. Know where your water comes from.
   3. Coconut water is the BEST for a quick boost of electrolytes!

1. Oils Oils Oils
   1. Cook with Coconut or Grapeseed
   2. Supplement with Hemp Oil: Salads & Smoothies
   3. Use on your body w/ Essential Oils

1. Protein Sources
   1. Vegan/Raw? CHIA*SPIRULINA*SEEDS*SPROUTS
   2. Vegetarian? Beans, Eggs, Acorns, Quinoa, ALL VEGGIES!
   3. Raw Protein Powders (Shaker)

1. YOGA (Divine Union) & QI GONG (Energetic Discipline)
   1. Prevents injury & maintains flexibility
   2. Ekagra- single pointed focus (The Yoga Sutras)
   3. Mastery of control/discipline

1. MASSAGE / Bodywork
   1. Reduces all types of tension, builds immunity
   2. Increased Flexibility, Strength, and Stamina
   3. Every ATHLETE needs & deserves it

1. The Circle as Sadhana (Daily Devoted Practice)
   1. Increased bodily intelligence; DNA Restructuring
   2. Mastery in the Flow of Life; The Flower of Life; Merkaba Feild
   3. Ability to converse with the Masses about the most Sacred Symbol of All

1. BHAKTI (Devotion) & SEVA (Self-Less Service)
   1. Hoop with Children (Farmer’s Markets, Festivals, Front Yards)
   2. Encourage them ALL that they are perfect and unbroken
   3. Gift Hoops, Time and Talents

10. The Nine Breathe Method (as taught by Jeff Primack)

1. Breath Work helps to focus the mind, body, and day
2. A psychedelic drug free experience of meeting ‘God/Dess
3. Tibetan Tumo Breathing/Builds Inner Fire

Shellie’s Story:
    Raised on the soul food of the low-country lands of South Carolina, at 19 I was 170 pounds. As a heavy drinker, foodie and fun-loving collage drop out, I ventured to the dark-side in the realms of ‘drugs, sex and rock-n-roll’. After multiple illnesses, accidents, and bouts of bad luck, I turned my life around at 20 when I chose to quit drinking, smoking, eating meat and thinking negative thought patterns on a daily basis. I spent my 21st birthday totally sober and as my own designated driver. Randomly, I enrolled in massage school and in three months lost 30 pounds. The other 30 pounds melted away over the years as I consciously walked from the shade into the bright lights of personal training, food healing, yoga, Qi Gong, conscious breathing, and of course, Sacred Hoop Dance. At 23 the hoop grabbed me, compelled me, and navigated me into a world of magic, mysticism, mastery, grace, creative overflow, spiritual devotion and pure enchantment. I was forever transformed and would never be able to return to a life of laziness and purposeless slumber. Three years ago ‘The Healthy Hooper’ came to life as a result of my passion for wanting to pass on all of the helpful healthful information I can to all walks of life, especially children. My goal is to have ‘The Healthy Hooper’ as a fitness/wellness program in schools internationally; with focus on Organic Gardens, Easy Food Prep, Daily Yoga, Meditation, Qi Gong, Sacred Hoop Dance and Creative Play, ‘The Healthy Hooper’s’ Mission is to spread as much enjoyment, awareness and creative spark as humanly possible. Anytime you are living the life of a ‘Healthy Hooper’, you are being an ambassador of The Sacred Circle and all can see! I am blessed that I came from a family that loved me through hardship and a long road to loving myself. I want to pass this love along! I am available for any type of counseling and coaching. If I can make the major life changes I did with grace, ease and confidence…anyone can.
You’re thoughts are the key. Create your reality with love as your intention, breathe deeply, and step into The Circle to pray, play and stay…you J
~
Aloha. Sat Nam. Blessings.

Shellie White Light
www.TheHealthyHooper.com



The following is perspective of The Hooping Body/ Megz “GroovinMegzz” Abernathy
Website: www.thehoopingbody.com

Main guidelines on injury prevention and athletic body care J
1. Always perform a warm-up before hooping or any other physical activity
a)    preferred WITHOUT the hoop
b)   Movement in every major joint! Ankles, knees, hips, shoulder & neck
c)    Typical warm up should last 3-5 minute 

2. Analyze your flow patterns
a) Where do you find yourself hooping? On body, off body, both?
      b) What are your flow habits? Moves you do on a repetitive basis?
      c) Do you use one side of your body more than the other? Are your movements balanced?
    
  3.   Stretch after your hoop practice or activity
a) Stretch every joint! Ankles, knees, hips, shoulders & neck!
b) Hold each stretch for at least 10-15 seconds & breathe deep
c) Lengthening muscles is very important for injury prevention! Do not slack on stretching! It is FREE and it feels good! There are no more excuses. You have time.

  4. Hydration and Diet
            a) 17-20 oz of water 2-3 hours before activity & replacing fluids as necessary
       b) EAT a snack or light meal before hooping or physical activity. Pre workout meal/snack should be relatively high in carbohydrate to maximize blood glucose availability, relatively low in fat and fiber to minimize gastrointestinal distress and facilitate gastric emptying, moderate in protein and well-tolerated by the individual.
Ex. Quinoa, Lentils, Rice cakes, brown long grain rice, old fashioned oatmeal, organic granola 
            c) Supplement as needed! If you train hard in other activities such as aerial, yoga, or running additional nutrients may be required! There is a potential need for increased protein and healthy fats on training days. Glutamine and amino acid support can help for long duration activities. Ask me for more information!
d) Protein requirements for Endurance Athletes are around 1.2g/kg
wt in kg=wt in lbs/2.2 Ex: 130lbs/59kg needs around 71g protein on training days
Vegetarians/Vegans need to consume 1.3-1.8g/kg. Due to the fact that plant proteins are less well digested than animal proteins, an increase in intake of approximately 10% protein is advised

A precious gift

Today I received an amazing gift in the mail from my younger sister Leslie Stone. 

She sent me several Herkimer crystals which are also my birthstone.  :)
They are only found in Herkimer, NY and Tibet. These special stones are ascension stones, and help take you to the highest spiritual vibration possible while still being in the physical body.
 They help purify your energy field and attune you to the while light of your DIVINE essence. 

I'm so grateful for her sending me a beautiful hand written card with these precious stones. The intention alone help elevate my spirits. 

Grateful. 

Thank you sister!!

Jumping into the Unknown...

My Inner flame was very dim, 

Felt my choices were also slim

Moving out of the city I loved

Had to stop being pushed,shoved

Betrayed and lied to

Not sure what else to do

"Make the Jump-the net will appear"

"Make the first steps-The path will soon be clear..."

Heart is feeling cleansed

Sight through a more clear lens

The inner flame is growing

still flickers, but it's glowing

Time will continue showing

This choice was wise one

Follow your heart and the Colorado Sun

When I decided to make the move to Colorado, I was really jumping into blind faith. Trusting people I barely knew, trusting things would fall into place. I had $500 to my name. A few job options lined up, a few friends to call upon. 

Yesterday began my fourth month in my journey. Things are slowing shaping into fruition. 

I've got the best job I could have possibly landed. Working for a small private personal training studio, I'm going to have the opportunity to grow with a small local company. It's a perfect fit. My mentor/boss is educating me on the way he's trained;his program design ideas. Its incredible information backed by science. Some I'm familiar with, other information is brand new. 

I'm only going to continue to grow, expand and become more successful than I could have ever imagined. 

I'm grateful to have made the jump into the unknown. I miss my loves in Portland, but my heart is healed. My head is clear. My soul is cleansed. I got out of the worst situation I could have been in. I'm so proud of myself. 

Not saying I'm not still scared. I still have my weak moments. Where I crumbled and drop to my knees and cry. Things are still a little shaky financially. BUT I know I'm at the end of this. I've learned so much in the last year. I've been broken in almost every way possible. Emotionally, financially, and physically. Grateful for all the experiences. 

Grateful for the good times coming around the bend.